||[Dec. 4th, 2013|11:45 pm]
Title: Potpourri (5/?)
Pairing(s): DooWoon, JunWoon
Word Count: 2,000+ maybe
Summary: He never said, “no,” and because he never said, “no,” they never stopped. Because you never say “no” to hyung.
After their cold drinks and a round of sleepy kisses from Dongwoon, DooWoon settled down into the comfy couch. Dongwoon felt dizzy and rest his head in the middle of Doojoon’s lap and unraveled his long body across the remaining length of the sofa. He was really tired. He didn’t grasp very much sleep that night waiting up for his hyung. Doojoon’s brown orbs watched over him fondly as he was slipping away; locks and strands of the boy’s dark hair caressed his fingertips as he meddled with them. The smile on his lips was brittle. It broke and died.
He loved Son Dongwoon; he wasn’t lying about that. That boy made him feel things no other human had ever made or could ever make him feel—emotionally, sexually, and whatever-else-ally. He was of a different stock. A different brand. He was rare, exotic and precious, and he was his. His Woonie. His secret little two-legged slice of genuine happiness. His infinite rays of sunshine on those sunshine-less days. He was the better half of him—the complete half of him.
Yeah, Doojoon regretted not taking his ring off before he came home to the boy. He knew it was going to upset him… But he did not purchase the pair of rings without an internal struggle. Yes, he loved the woman he was with. He loved her, okay. Although, when he stared at the rings encased by a crystal dome of glass, he could not help but think about the boy he left behind.
He was just as important—if not more important—to him. He had earned a sacred piece of jewelry years ago.
But Doojoon was not going to purchase Dongwoon a ring if he could not go through with the promise that came with it. He would not wound him anymore than he’d already had, for if he presented him with such a ring, he would be promising himself forever to the boy. That was juvenile, wishful thinking.
He could not be with Dongwoon forever. No ring for him. Just flowers and candies.
Flowers that would eventually perish.
Candies that would eventually rot.
A childish game of pretend that would eventually end.
After the big discovery of the so-called “insignificant” ring, everything continued to haul ass downhill for the boy…
(Two days later…)
With Doojoon on his date and Junhyung gone to the studio, Dongwoon was left with nothing to do but be beside himself—at least, for that evening. When the sun was high in the heavens, he practiced some lines with his colleagues for an upcoming musical he was to be featured in, but he got bored of the monotony of it all and set off to participate in his favorite pastime of all…
…strewing his body onto a bed and pondering about his immorality, fancy terminology for whorishness. No really, if he ever heard one of the hyungs or anyone call him a whore, his heart would seriously combust into a trillion droplets of fire.
Doojoon returned from his date. He crawled on top of the napping boy. He wet his lips and pecked the other’s cheeks. They were so warm against his lips. He loved Dongwoon’s skin. No one had softer skin than his baby… Doojoon crammed more little kisses into the toasty crook of the boy’s neck. His hands found and grasped his thighs.
Dongwoon’s body wriggled at Doojoon’s foreplay disinterestedly. Instantly, Doojoon knew something was amiss. He sucked his teeth in annoyance. “There’s always something goin’ on with you,” he commented, “what do you want me to do, Woon? What do you want me to say? To do?”
“I don’t want to share you anymore…” Dongwoon mumbled.
“What d’you mean?”
“I meant what I just said… I don’t like sharing you. I want you to myself…”
“I mean it, hyung…”
“Well then Dongwoon what do you want me t’ do? Just up and leave her? You know I can’t do that.”
“Why can’t you?”
“Because I am in love with her, that’s why.”
Dongwoon swallowed at the sincere conviction in Doojoon’s reply.
“Do you love me…?”
“Yes. Yes, I love you, Woon. You know I love you. Why must I tell you this every day?”
“Because… ‘cause I don’t feel like you love me…”
“Well I do.”
“But you love her more than you love me.”
“I love you both the same.”
“No you don’t.”
“Yes I d—Woon, this is a stupid. Arguing about this is stupid, and it’s a waste of air. You know I love you. You both are equal.”
“I don’t want to be equal. I want to be yours, Yoon Doojoon… I want to be yours! Why can’t I just be yours!?”
“She gets a ring, and I don’t. You flaunt her around, you take her out on these dates. All we do is drink and have sex. Sex sex sex. That’s all you want from me. That’s all you want from me and I don’t get anything. I’ve never gotten anything else, hyung!! ANYTHING!! NOTHING!!”
“AND YOU KNOW WHY, DONGWOON. YOU KNOW WHY I CAN’T DO THAT.”
“’CAUSE YOU DON’T WANT EVERYONE TO FIND OUT YOU’RE REALLY A FAG? IS THAT IT? IS THAT WHY?”
“THAT’S EXACTLY WHY,” Dooojoon roared.
Dongwoon blinked. Dongwoon’s eyes rounded, not in fear, but in revelation. He turned back into a boy. Doojoon’s visage melted and unclenched as he stared at the rising waters forming at the corners of his lover’s glossy, beer-bottle-brown orbs. They were very beautiful…
“I… I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Well how else did you mean to say it? What other ways can you tell me that you don’t really love me? That you really don’t care…?”
Dongwoon tried to rise up and away from Doojoon. Doojoon clutched his wrists to gently pin him down onto the bed. He twisted beneath Doojoon. Doojoon would not let him go. The more the boy struggled, the more tears were spilt. And he finally punched Doojoon in the chest. And he got onto his feet and left the room.
(The next day…)
A non-smoking Junhyung was a very irritable Junhyung. No one knew why the rapper was acting in such a fidgety, edgy fashion. Dongwoon knew… He did all he figured possible to make him comfortable… Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn’t…
The maknae found him cursing rather loud around in the multi-purpose room. He peeked through, a little concerned…
“I can’t find them. I can’t fuckin’ find them.”
Junhyung’s was literally flipping everything up-side down. He had torn up his entire area looking for his earphones.
“Have you seen them?” he asked Woon.
Dongwoon entered the room, “Seen what, Junhyung?”
“My fuckin’ headphones. I fuckin’ seriously just had ‘em and now I can’t fuckin’ find ‘em anywhere.”
He angry rattled on and on about how much money he spent on them. Dongwoon observed his hyung s’more, watching him further destroy the space in the most literal sense possible… Junhyung’s rage built and built…
“Hyung…” Dongwoon approached the elder, grasping hold of his hands, “come. Sit down with me.”
Junhyung followed the maknae to the loooong sofa. They took their seats together; Woonie held on to his hand with one of his, but touched Jun’s cheek with the other. He peered finely into his tiny pupils, into his anxious, enlarged eyes…
“Calm down, Junhyung… Breathe like me.”
Junhyung complied, following the younger’s instrcutions by regulating his breathing. Woon felt him loosen and unwind.
“Better?” Woonie smiled.
Junhyung smirked, squeezing the younger’s hand, “……Yeah. A li’l bit.”
It was more than just missing headphones. He craved the nicotine; it was driving him up various walls. Had been for some time; stickers and gum weren’t cuttin’ it on some days. Dongwoon’s lips softly upturned happily. Hyung was trying. He was keeping his promise. The younger took both hyung’s hands again. He put his lips to the inside of his palm, and then, he carried his lips over to the side of Junhyung’s right ear and planted a kiss there, and then, he pasted a kiss to his cheek, and then he pushed them onto the elder’s soft, warm lips. There was an absence of ash.
That kiss launched little wet kisses, and grew to big wet kisses; it got Jun riled up. His hands left Woonie’s hands and spread to the latter’s back. Junhyung leaned into him intensely. And they kissed and kissed. The elder’s heart slowed and steadied… he felt deluged with waves of calm warmth.
“I don’t want you going crazy…” Dongwoon muttered, their lips peeling apart. Junhyung’s thumb traced the top of his cheekbone, his eyes flickering from his mouth to his eyes.
“I don’t either, but if this is what I gotta go through to quit, then, I’m just gonna have to deal.”
Dongwoon caressed his hyung’s upper thighs, “It’ll get easier for you. It’s not always gonna be this hard…”
Junhyung ejected a rough sigh… “Yeah…”
“I-I’m proud of you for doing this…” the boy murmured. He blinked kindly at his hyung with the corner of his lips pulled upward. Junhyung’s returning grin was kinda small. But sweet. Their mouths flirted before committing to a kiss, and another kiss. Delicate kisses. Oh Dongwoon missed the feel of those kisses—he missed kisses in general. The maknae pushed against Junhyung’s lips firmer with each meeting with more desperation.
He and Doojoon weren’t on such good terms lately… No messages, no sex, no contact whatsoever. It made Dongwoon kinda numb. Junhyung livened those numb places with his lips, his eyes, his body… The sky was blue when the boy had Junhyung to talk to. And hug. And kiss.
“Are you okay?” Junhyung inquired between kisses. He was not accustomed to Dongwoon being so vicious.
“You sure, Woon?”
“You absolutely sure?”
“Yeah, I’m sure.”
“’Cause we can talk.”
“You don’t wanna talk?”
So they had sex instead.
honestly no lie i don't know where i'm gonna go with this at all. OTL this might just be the last part. out of ideas.
.-. thanks for readiiiiiinggggggggg though